You lock eyes while reaching for the same piece of fruit in the produce department, you spend the next few years in a blissful courtship, and the rest is history — right?
NEWS FLASH: Dating isn't always that simple. And chances are, it'll come with plenty of speed bumps along the way.
Although dating can be a lot of fun, it can also involve a lot of time, energy, and, sometimes, stress. Plus, with online dating now being more common than meeting through friends, dating can come with a new set of complications.
While you're wrapped up in finding that special someone, you may not notice the subtle — but impactful — ways dating can take a toll on your wellbeing
Dating certainly isn't the enemy. It can be exciting, provide you with important perspectives, and help you form meaningful relationships.
At the same time, it's important to keep an eye on how it can impact your life in ways that may fly under the radar. Here are 4 health-related impacts of dating you may not be aware of — and what you can do about them.
1. Dating can consume all of your energy.
From texting to coffee dates to full-blown dinner-and-a-movie dates, the dating life can be exhausting. Just one date can take up your entire evening, and if you become interested in someone, that can lead to multiple get togethers a week — which leaves little time for yourself.
As for online dating, you may not have to leave your couch. But people spend an average of 1.5 hours a day swiping right or left, and that can add up.
If you let it, dating can take away from important parts of your life, from your career to your daily workout to time with friends and family. And it can also take away from some much needed "me-time".
The key is to know your limits and plan ahead. For instance, experts recommend spending less than 30 minutes on dating sites each day. After that, it can become unproductive. As for in-person dates, schedule out your week in advance, and try to avoid canceling important plans whenever possible.
Look out for ways to multitask, as well. For instance, you can go on a bike ride to avoid skipping your workout or meet your date for lunch during your lunch hour. Dates don't always have to be a 3-hour fancy dinner.
2. Dating can cause excess stress and anxiety.
Nervousness, butterflies — there's no denying that pre-date jitters are a real thing. It can be scary to go on a first date, whether or not you've met the other person before. And the second, third, and fourth dates? Those can be just as nerve-wracking.
Social anxiety, which is when a person fears being judged by others or doing something embarrassing, affects nearly 20% of the adult population in the US. Because dates are often one-on-one situations, they can be anxiety-causing for many. This can lead to other problems, such as a suppressed immune system and digestive issues. In fact, anxiety can be cyclical and even leave you more vulnerable to anxiety and depression in the future.
Fortunately, there are ways to combat dating-related stress, such as:
- Talking about your dates with a trusted friend, who can provide you with support and guidance
- Exercising before your date to boost your mood and distract yourself from worries for a little while
- Reminding yourself that you're a great catch — and focusing on what you have to offer in a relationship
- Pushing away exaggerated thoughts, such as "I'll never be able to find someone!"
Remember — your date is probably just as nervous as you are. Try not to judge yourself too harshly, and do your best to enjoy getting to know them.
3. Dating can lead to unhealthy eating and drinking.
Think about the last date you went on — what did you do? If you're like many people, dates involve dining out, complete with fun appetizers, a tasty dessert, and maybe an additional glass of wine.
Americans already eat nearly one-quarter of their meals away from home. Add dating into the mix, and that number is sure to go up. Unfortunately, restaurant food tends to be on the unhealthier side due to:
- Large portion sizes — often enough for 2 or more people
- Pre-dinner snacks, like bread and chips
- Excess calories
- High levels of sodium, fat, and saturated fat
While it can be tempting to splurge on a particularly tasty — but unhealthy — meal while you're enjoying the company of someone special, it's important to remain aware of your eating habits.
Some ways you can ensure you keep your body healthy without foregoing a dinner out include:
- Making a plan by looking for healthier options on the restaurant's menu ahead of time
- Not showing up to your date starving — eat a light, healthy snack beforehand so you're not ready to scarf down the entire bread basket right away
- Splitting your meal with your date (if you're comfortable doing that), or ordering a lunch-size portion
- Sticking to one alcoholic drink — and opting for a healthier choice such as red wine instead of a sugary margarita
Keep in mind — dating doesn't always have to involve dining out. Try cooking a healthy meal at home or doing an activity together, such as going on a hike. Besides, you'll get to see multiple sides of your date's personality outside of the routine setting of a restaurant.
Plus, eating out can take a toll on your finances — nearly one-third of people ages 18 to 34 are in debt due to dating. By keeping dinners out to a minimum, both your body and your wallet will thank you.
4. Online dating can lead to digital isolation and safety risks.
One of the best parts of dating is the opportunity to branch out and meet new people. Whether you get to know a couple of different people or form a deeper bond with just one, it's a powerful feeling to connect with another human being.
Unfortunately, online dating has thrown a wrench into the dating world. It's become easier than ever to feel like you're out there meeting new people — when you're actually sitting on your couch at home.
While two-thirds of people have reported going on a date with someone they've met through an app, that means one-third haven't, and that may lead to some feelings of digital isolation and loneliness.
In person, you can communicate in ways that are impossible online, including eye contact, facial expressions, gestures, and maybe most importantly — touch. Humans are programmed to feel closer to those they come into physical contact with, whether it's through a hug, holding hands, or even a handshake.
Plus, online dating poses safety risks that meeting through a mutual friend may not. Online, it may be easier to stretch the truth or hold back important information. In fact, 81% of people lie about themselves on their online dating profile. While the lie may be minor — such as about their height — it's possible that it could be about something more significant.
If you decide to use online dating, it's important to be smart and plan ahead. This includes:
- Making sure you meet in public for your first few dates
- Telling a friend where you're going and giving them the name of your date
- Being careful about revealing too much personal information right away
- Trusting your instincts — and ending the date if you feel uncomfortable in any way
Online dating is an excellent resource. More and more people are ending up in committed relationships thanks to the wonders of apps that connect them to a wide variety of people. However, it's not your only resource, and a relationship can only go so far without face-to-face interactions.
It's important to take the next step (when you're ready) to avoid feeling isolated in the digital world. At the same time, stay smart about how you use online dating, and make sure the person you meet has good intentions.
The Overwhelming Benefits of Dating
Dating can provide you with exciting opportunities to meet new people, engage in fun activities, and maybe even find that special someone. As you navigate the sometimes complicated dating world, make sure you prioritize your own wellbeing — both mentally and physically.
When you're happy and healthy on your own, you'll have much more to offer in a relationship, and you'll be able to continue to find new ways to enjoy the company of others through dating.
Do you have questions about maintaining your health and well-being? Call 610-738-2300 to find a primary care provider near you.
Related Information from Chester County Hospital: